Join for FREE | Take the Tour Lost Password?
Shop deviantART for the
holidays and save BIG!
Click here! :holly:
[x]

deviantART

:date:
 


One lovely morning,
I found a fresh rose.
I quickly thought of you,
and your lovely smile.
I thought of the rain,
and remembered us dancing!

Remember our first dance?
You came down here to visit one morning,
as the clouds unleashed relentless rain.
Right before, I handed you a luscious rose.
Roses always made you smile.
After our dance, I cried out, “Brava!  You

are so incredible!” Oh, I remember how you
enjoyed to visit me and dance and dance!
Your passion for this art brought a smile
to my face every single, beautiful morning.
Just like my plethora of fresh, divine roses
brought you joy even during the harshest rain!

One peaceful day that began with rain,
I caressed your hair and whispered to you,
“Stay with me, my sweet, delicate rose!
Let us continue our passionate dance
and always wake up together every morning.
So that way, I will always see your glorious smile!”

And one day, that glorious smile
could not vanquish the freezing rain
that came down that horrible morning.
I remembered the tears running down your
cheeks and you said softly, “Our dance
must end! I can’t stay here forever!”  My rose

fell to the earth!  No rose
can ever bring back your smile
Nor can it ever make you dance
with me once more.  The rain
will always make me think of you
and what we lost that terrible morning.

One cold morning, I found a dying rose.
I immediately thought of you and your smile.
It began to rain, and I remembered us dancing.
:iconthesparklingrose:

Author's Comments

A poem I wrote for class fairly recently

Comments


love 0 0 joy 1 1 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconlaxaria:
Deep and innocent, making it heartfelt and emotional.

I like the chose of the rose as a symbol which you build the poem around. Somewhat cliched, but still well used to achieve the desired effect.

I quite like this piece. Good job!

--
My Poems | 25 words of Inspiration | My Prose
:iconthesparklingrose:
Thanks. I really am not much of a poet so your comments are really special to me!
:iconwiseangel1220:
I enjoyed reading this.

I especially like how your stanzas are broken up.

--
~NevA Be AfraiD of The ImPossiblE~
:iconwiseangel1220:
No problem. :w00t!:

--
~NevA Be AfraiD of The ImPossiblE~
:iconwthemily:
I really admire how your poem didn't seem forced, because I usually struggle with that when I write sestinas. This is very well written.

--
Don's stop calling. You're the reason I love losing sleep.
:iconthesparklingrose:
Same here with sestinas. I'm more of a prose guy myself. Thanks you very much.
:iconthesparklingrose:
thanks. your comment means so much to me.

Details

July 7
1.8 KB

Statistics

9
0
25 (0 today)
0 (0 today)

Site Map